PFC Episode 21: For the Love of Meat

Loretta Fabron Onfoy explains the importance of the meat industry to the modern vampire coven. She also tells a story in 1931 when during the Great Depression the coven hunted and ate their last human victim and how the meat was divided and the total yields.

For more information or to ask Lady Loretta a question: please visit https://www.elizabethguizzetti.com/paperflowerconsortium or email her at info@paperflowerconsortium.com

Written and Performed by Elizabeth Guizzetti

Music:

Opening and Closing music: Loretta's Theme by Evan Witt.
Learn More at www.wittynotes.com

Support the show by donating to our patreon. 

Chapters

• 0:00 Opening
• 0:48 Welcome back, Beloved Initiates,
• 1:38 Fears for the Meat Industry
• 4:59 Vampires Remember Times of Hunger
• 15:10 A word from Smile Forever Dental
• 15:50 Question from Initiates
• 17:18 Closing Credits

Transcript

0:00 Vampires of the paper flower consortium episode 21: For the Love of Meat

MUSIC: LORETTA'S THEME by Evan Witt

 Recording by Loretta Fabron Onfoy, former lady of the Kingdom of France, current historian and librarian of the Paper Flower Consortium

0:48 Welcome back my beloved initiates and other listeners,

 I have the sad task of informing you all Initiate Troy has left us. Fear not, he is not dead, or at least he was not dead the last time we saw him. Troy had believed that time made us forget our past trials which obviously is not true because I tell you our histories. He decided eternity was not for him and chose to seek out the Werewolves of the Howling Moon. We wish him the best.

1:38 Tonight we shall discuss the importance of the meat industry to the vampire. As having enough food is one of the expectations of humanity. It is a widely held misbelief that vampires waste food. That we only drink the blood of our victims and leave the rest to rot. By now, you ought to know that is not the case at all. Humans are delicious, but they are not the only source of meat and blood on this planet. We do not require the death of humans no matter how much we enjoy human blood. I have spoken of us eating the flesh as well as drinking the blood. And we can even expand our diets further by adding blood to help us digest other things. However, we do taste and smell the signs of rot earlier than many species and in general do not like the taste of it. However, that does not mean we turn away food if we are hungry.

 Also, we don’t waste meat because hunting takes a lot of energy. I believe there is a human phrase which I’ve heard from one of the cooking shows my enthralled enjoy, which explains the truth of the matter. Snout to tail. Back when we hunted our food, we ate snout to tail. And when our food was human we ate toe to skull. 

 Some vampires are beginning to fear that as veganism grows in popularity, we will lose our beef supplier. One of the reasons vampire covens are able to make offspring is the meat industry. 

Between Charles and I, we have twenty offspring, I cannot imagine my existence without any of them, but when we hunted we could not have supported such a large family. This world of surplus food allows us to have many children. 

That being said, we do not buy from factory farms, we believe in free range cattle and chickens and pigs and try to get all our meat sourced locally. Our current supplier is organic as well. Existing in a state like Washington makes this possible. 

But a time may come when humans stop believing in eating meat. I have spoken before that vampires cannot subsist on vegetable proteins alone. We need blood and flesh. 

If the meat industry collapses as other industries have collapsed due to time or invention, at first, we will rely upon our enthralled humans even more. 

However, some believe we must ready ourselves for that night by finding other sources of food.  Some believe we should hunt humans as they are pressing upon the environment in ways that the vampire does not do to their frantic lifestyle. However, we live long and who is to say that we don’t also press upon the environment. Obviously, we will also consume deer and other game meats as we did in previous centuries. And we may raise our own meat, but that would mean moving the coven. There is no land for sheep to graze in the middle of the city. 

However, I must inform you we have seen industries collapse and not know what was going to happen until it did. Americans don’t eat whale meat or use whale oil for heat and light anymore. If you had tried to explain to us what we would now use for heat and light, we would have thought you fanciful at best. So I don’t fear the future, however, if you do fear it, you might need to rethink your plans to be a vampire.

Still for now, there is plenty to eat, especially in America, but those of us who have lived through leaner times than any human of this century can know, we understand the fear of famine.

 But before I go on, let me explain how and when the elders of this coven ate humans. 

4:59
Once they were settled in France, Agata and Jakub primarily sustained themselves with sheep and goat’s blood. Capital Punishment at the time was considered a social good. When a crime warranted capital punishment, Jakub executed the criminal. Then the person was given last rites. However, instead of burying the body, Jakub and Agata ate them. As a wife, one of Agata’s duties was to know how to carve meat to make it last the longest.

After Pascaline and Charles were transformed, Pascaline killed the soldiers that killed our birth family. I of course had to wait. My family ate some of them, Gaius’s kin ate others. And so did some of the starving human populous. 

Later in Versailles, Pascaline killed a few or several people who would not be charged with crimes, but committed acts of dreadful brutality, primarily wife beaters and rapists. She and Charles ate most of them until I turned and ate them too. 

Agata felt that it was good for Pascaline to hunt as she mourned so much in those years. And I am proud to have such a caring husband that he held my sister’s hand when she visited the crypt of my niece, and once he was her brother, hunted beside her without judgement. 

I joined them after I was transformed.  

For many years, we subsisted primary on sheep, but we hunted wicked doers a few times a year. And so it was for centuries, even we after moved to America and began to build the Paper Flower Consortium. Then the world turned and each human life became important. Now we kill only when required. And we never waste the meat.

So let us back to 1931, we no longer raised our own livestock as our family had moved onto more gentle pursuits. Pascaline and Charles still killed for food occasionally. At that time, there was a farm nearby and we got most our meat from them. But during the Great Depression, this farmer lost his land due to his high debt load. Fearing for his wife and children, he committed suicide. 

The cows were sold to other farms and were either not slaughtered or not slaughtered for food.

Now at that time we had eight vampires and ten enthralled humans. 

Ten humans could not offer enough blood for eight vampires as our primary food source.  

We depended upon our enthralled more and more, but our enthralled found it difficult to get enough sustenance to sustain us with their blood. This of course is also before the days of Doctor Drew’s amazing revelation of how to preserve blood in the late 1930s. 

Then our luck worsened as grocers began to close. Derrik’s enthralled human found a supply of salmon which was meant for the cannery, but we paid a better price to get it. But a salmon is not as big as cow and the food just didn’t last very long.

So many people were hungry. America felt like France or England before we left those shores.  

Fearing for the enthralled population, Agata went hunting, alone. She did not want one of the men to frighten the prey or Pascaline’s moral directives. 

She found a man. By his smell, he lived in the shanty town, but he was in good health. Agata seduced him back to our building with a bottle of illegal whisky. Once he was drunk, Agata slipped her will over him and told him to sleep and feel no pain and never to wake again. He was unconscious when Charles bound his feet and hauled him to a crossbeam in the old barn’s ceiling. 

Agata cut open the man’s throat. He never woke. His body never reacted as if he felt pain.

Blood pooled in the trough beneath him. I remember how much I wanted to dunk my face into the deep red life force and slather it upon my tongue. However, we had three youngish vampires to feed. 

There is approximately ten pints of blood in an adult human body. Each of the six elder vampires took 1 pint and Xiao and Alice got two pints each.

I was so hungry it was the most delicious blood I ever tasted. Its warmth coated my tongue in a delightful way. I sipped leisurely wanting to make it last. I remember that my pace drove Charles to irrationality. 

Derrik, Alice and Xiao also consumed a steak from the man’s leg that night, but the rest of us ate nothing. I admit we were all still hungry.

Agata carved the rest of the meat from the body and hung it in our cellar to keep the heat of the day from it. 

Now a human body will yield about 75 pounds of delectable meat. Each vampire ate a pound of flesh per night until it was gone. 

Agata melted the fat and boiled the bones for broth. We drank that concoction for several nights after.  Agata fried the skin in oil. We ate that too. 

Thankfully, by the time we finished off the human, our enthralled had been well rested and were able to donate blood. 

Pascaline had found a new beef supplier in Northbend who was thrilled to get our money for his cows, because he feared he might have to close his farm. We put up money for cows to be slaughtered at intervals which he agreed to and that relationship lasted for twenty-years until his death. 

And as he would no longer need it, our last transaction was to pay him handsomely for his corpse. As arranged, his family were given ashes, they never knew, but that money certainly provided for them. 

 So there is no reason to fear, because as you see, there are options. Another point, the meat industry does not just provide meat for humans, and as long as humans have symbiotic relationships with meat eating animals, such as cats, some meat will be raised at least on a small scale. 

15:10 And now a word from our Sponsor: Smile Forever Dental

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And remember, you may enjoy tearing into the flesh of your victims, but do not chew on bones, it shortens the life of your dental work. Follow Agata’s example and boil them and make them into a broth instead! 

15:50 Now it’s time for questions:

Initiate Katie asks, Lady Loretta, did you just say sometimes you buy human bodies?

I actually said that in 1952, a sick farmer sold us his body as we had an initiation that year and the farmer was dying of a painful cancer. It is nutritious for a young vampire to have human blood and flesh. Sometimes, sick humans sell us their bodies, but only their own bodies! Or we gain bodies from enthralled humans who gift us their corpses after death. Or of course, Norma occasionally runs into a human who preys on the vulnerable and if they are a predator of children or young women, they go after her innocent-looking shell. And those who go after Norma never live to speak of it and as one vampire cannot eat a whole human and she doesn’t have the freezer space, she most generously shares it with the coven. 

 Have a good day, beloved initates, and sleep the sleep of the dead. 

 17:18 CREDITS

The Vampires of the Paper Flower Consortium Podcast was written and performed by Elizabeth Guizzetti. 

If you love this podcast, like and share this episode. And if you can please consider donating either onetime or through the patreon.

If you have questions or comments for Lady Loretta, please contact her at info@paperflowerconsortium or through the Vampires of the Paper Flower Consortium Patreon. 

The amazing intro and outro music was written by Evan Witt and you can learn more about his music at www.wittynotes.com.

 MUSIC: LORETTA'S THEME by Evan Witt

VO Thanks for listening!